alone time
by rantywoman
I think I’ve put my finger on why I’ve been feeling a bit numb lately, even while doing the things I enjoy, like swimming in the ocean on a beautiful day.
It’s not that I mind doing so many things alone– as I always have done so– it’s that I’m not feeling particularly connected to anyone, anywhere. So there’s a certain pointlessness that has crept in, even though I’m generally feeling even-keeled.
thebitterbabe 
I moved back to my native city, so that I could spend time with my parents while they’re still fun. And I enjoy feeling connected with them. Doing ordinary things like meeting them at Costco. Sometimes they meet me for lunch. I use them when I want to go to a show with someone. And it turns out they can be helpful when I need emotional support. Also good for a hug.
My nephew and his wife are expecting a baby. I would like to feel more connected with them. I would like to be able to enjoy their baby. But I am not in the habit of spending time with them now. So how will I magically turn into a person who spends time with them once the baby arrives? I am thinking how to intentionally change my relationship with them. Create a new normal. It will not be easy. Being close with people, and spending time with them, is not part of my pattern. I need a reason to interact with people. I have to make reasons. I think it’s all on me to reach out and do this. I anticipate it being awkward. Not unwelcome by them, but still awkward.
Good luck! That was my intention when I made my last move back to my home state, but that move didn’t work out.