the hipster
by rantywoman
I miss hipsters. In all their various guises they are easy to poke fun at it, but over the last twenty-five years I’ve thrived most when living in the hipster corridors of the United States. Romantically, no, but my failure in that realm cuts across all social realms, so I can’t pin that one entirely on the hip.
The thing about hipsters is they are obsessives. They obsess about music, movies, books, fashion, food, art, and ideas, and they are attracted to the novel and to alternative lifestyles.
When you remain single and childless, what else are you gonna do? Those have been my interests too.
The question is, over the age of forty, can you be a hipster? It’s a look and stance that doesn’t age particularly well, although aging is hard on everyone. Perhaps one’s hipsterdom hardens even as the young move on to various new iterations (http://madmommamoogacat.wordpress.com/2013/01/25/confessions-of-an-aging-hipster/). It does seem that it’s harder to get as excited about all things new as when gets older.
Most hipsters, like most people, have kids, although it seems they do so on the later side. They then turn to creating a hip family.
What about the rest of us? We don’t really fit in at a lot of the usual hipster haunts anymore, especially as older women. On the other hand, it’s really hard for me to relate to people who have spent the past several decades primarily focused on marriage and kids and careers and sports, while I was intently reading multiple books a week, obsessing over certain films and music albums and alternative social scenes, and attending all kinds of unusual events.
Where’s the commonality? I have become a certain type of person after spending the first twenty-five years of my emerging adulthood in a certain type of way. To completely lose touch with all that would be to lose who I am as a person.
thebitterbabe 
Oh my gosh you can have all the ones here since I feel the complete opposite! On a more serious note I think you can definitely be interested in the arts and culture without being or being around hipsters. People have been interested long before the current generation of hipsters existed. I know I am passionate about all those things myself. Do you think there are any people where you are who share those interests but it’s less obvious on the surface than it would be with a hipster? Of course those who are raising a family will usually have that as their main focus so I get that they may not have the time or attention as much for other things. Like you say, I definitely don’t think you should lose touch with your passions, even if you have fewer people to share them with right now.
I understand– when I have lived in a sea of hipsters I’ve gotten a bit cynical, but when they are completely absent it from my life it feels alienating. And yes, I agree that people who aren’t obviously “hip” can be interested in arts and culture, but if the art is at all edgy, they probably are a bit of a hipster.
I like all kinds of art, but definitely not a hipster. I think there are many like me out there, but I do get what you’re saying.
This is so interesting, because I’ve been thinking of similar things lately too. I’m in my mid-30s, never married/no kids, and recently dated a hipster in his late 20s very briefly. I look young for my age so for the past few years, I’ve been faced with this question of whether to dress my age/profession, or what I can get away with. This is compounded by the fact that I do have more edgy or artsy tastes than many people in my field (and particularly in my subfield), although I’m not really a hipster myself–I don’t pay enough attention to the latest fashion/music. I never was sure if the hipster guy thought I fit into his world, or saw me more as an older woman trying to act younger. However, it did dawn on me that I have more to talk about with hipsters than most women my own age, and that has left me wondering whether or not I should court hipster company. Sometimes it’s really maddening to know that my coworkers (even the ones without kids) don’t really pay much attention to non-mainstream films, music, art, weird random Internet stuff, etc.
Anyway, I guess I’ll just keep being me in my own not-quite-hipster-not-quite-mainstream way. I do feel like I can’t really quite find my spot, though, and I wonder if finding more counterculture folks to hang out with will insure against more alienation as I get older. Then I worry that I’ll age out of that too: too old to be a casual hipster, not authentic enough to be a diehard older hipster, too rebellious and restless to be a mainstream professional. Hm.
I love your blog, by the way. I’m always excited when I see the personal (i.e. non-italicized) posts.
Oh, thank you, I thought people would hate on this hipster post, but I gotta be honest.
I don’t have tats or quirky glasses or Betty Page bangs and in general have never been able to go 100% toward any hipster fashion statement/lifestyle, but I definitely have certain tastes and proclivities that lead me to feeling most comfortable in that realm. I can’t keep up with the latest music–an interest I think that dies out with age– but in other ways I stay pretty current. And you’re right, even a lot of childless people don’t seem all that intrigued by the offbeat.
I’m sort of the same. My tastes run toward the less mainstream in the arts and maybe other things. However I am not a fan of hipster culture and don’t share those tastes. I do think finding others with similar interests as you would be good. I don’t think you or they would “age out” of that. My tastes in that direction haven’t gone anywhere yet and I’m in my 40s and I don’t expect that will change. It does feel good to connect with others who share passions along similar lines. On another note I like the personalized, non ital posts here too 🙂