When I look back on the men I’ve fallen for in the past, almost to a one they were part of a social scene, a setting, or an activity I found exciting and enticing. That’s probably one of the reasons online dating never worked that well for me. Meeting someone in isolation didn’t provide the context I needed to generate a sense of intrigue and interest.
The first few years I lived in L.A., I was randomly dating from online, but eventually I stumbled upon a sector of the entertainment industry that was both appealing and, through live shows and social media and podcasts, relatively accessible and transparent. New romantic interests were hatched. For a spell, it was all very exciting, but after several flirtations failed to pan out, I gave up.
It’s no wonder that since I’m currently detached from any sort of consistent, coherent social scene or activity and am leaving my romantic fate up to random encounters, I’m losing my optimism that I’ll ever meet someone. My brain doesn’t seem to know how to form interest in the random guy next to me in the produce aisle or at the gas pump.