getting over it
by rantywoman
By my reckoning, here are some things I have “gotten over” in the past decade:
1. Getting over the need for a social scene, getting over the need for a social group, getting over the need for a best friend. All while getting over the idea of a close and supportive family of origin.
2. Getting over the idea that there is an ideal place to live. Some are more suited to me than others, yes, but all seem to involve significant trade-offs.
3. Getting over the idea that there is an ideal job. Again, some are more suited to me than others, but all involve the daily grind of solving one problem after another, eight hours a day, and all involve a certain amount of indignities suffered at the hands of the public, bosses, and co-workers.
4. Getting over the realization that I have ended up becoming the type of person whom, at least in some part of my youthful psyche, represented the worst sort of loserdom: single and childless and without some sort of glamorous career to compensate.
5. Getting over the idea that I am guaranteed to find a satisfying romantic relationship, despite being just as able to engage in one as the next person.
6. Getting over the idea that I can truly rely on anyone but myself.
These are pretty big things to process, and it certainly took some time, time that others were often too impatient to grant me:
Being told to “just get over it” is devaluing. It implies that I am making a mistake in processing an event. It indicates that something is wrong with ME because I am in still confused about something that has not been resolved. The statement is emotionally abusive. – See more at: http://emergingfrombroken.com/the-problem-with-statements-like-%e2%80%9cget-over-it%e2%80%9d/#sthash.CzelJbbm.dpuf
thebitterbabe 
I would enjoy seeing your next post in which you count your blessings.
Yes, that is actually the plan… couldn’t get to it this morning.
That is a lot of acceptance. Honestly I think it’s great. Life is not a rom-com movie, at least not for many of us. Accepting that and accepting that our reality may not look like the hoped for fantasy, and making the best of what we have and can control is huge in my opinion. So good for you. I’ve had a similar evolution over the years, I’m sure it’s still ongoing, over some similar and some different issues from you, and I think I’m in a better place about it all too. I think acceptance is key and then finding ways to make the best of what you do have, change things that can be changed, and accept the rest. Basically focus on the good and what’s within the locus of control.