wilting
by rantywoman
A few weeks ago I was surprised to read that a weekly comedy show was taking place at a bar here; I trekked down to check it out one night but there was no evidence of it happening, and since the venue consisted of small tables of people on dates or with friends, I didn’t stick around. I haven’t seen it advertised since. Then the little boho spot around the corner closed down. This weekend I checked out a group that (I hear) was once large, vibrant, fun, and eclectic; only myself, one other woman, and an elderly couple showed up. One half of the couple joked, “I bet you were hoping to meet some single men.” My solo state is both remarkable and irremediable, it seems.
In a couple of weeks I’m going to try another group and in July I’m looking forward to a big weekend event. And of course, beach weather is coming and I’ll be spending lots of time in the ocean.
By fall, though, I think I’ll have a pretty good sense of whether there’s anything for me here socially. I do treasure my alone time but am not sure I’m ready to become a complete hermit just yet. When the days grow short, I may have to start driving into L.A. every weekend in order not to wilt.
thebitterbabe 
I’ve always lived in or near a city. I fantasize about living someplace pretty. I wonder if I’d be bored. Or wilt. Or maybe fewer distractions would help me focus and follow through with things that are “just for me.” I often feel guilty if I’m not out there doing something and using the city… And of course I won’t meet anyone if I stay home.
I have that same conflict… should I drive into the city and see a show, or should I stay home and work on my own projects?
The older I get the more I enjoy living like a hermit. I have a friend who says she’s finds she feels more and more inclined to be a hermit also. Although this inclination probably depends on a person’s personality type to start with. I’m very much an introvert, the simplest definition of which is feeling one’s energy is drained from being exposed to people, instead of the other way around. Being a hermit for an introvert is not a bad thing, though as with most things, it probably helps if you get to do it by choice, as opposed to being forced to by circumstances. For an extrovert, and therefore someone who depends on other people to feel energised, it is probably not a good option.
I’ve been hermit like since I was a young person. However, I do need about two or three evenings or outings a week to stay sane. Not for long, just for a bit. Some conversation and sharing. It’s not easy to get sometimes.