the indecisive
by rantywoman
http://www.salon.com/2005/09/20/kunkel/
I have a sense that particularly in New York — though I’m sure it exists this way in Boston and in San Francisco — there is a super-abundance of attractive, intelligent young women whom a man is very unlikely to be worthy of, who nevertheless set a higher value on him than he sets on them. This makes any sort of decision very difficult. Because to constantly be exposed to people whom you are unworthy of to begin with, yet who want you more than you want them, is confusing.
thebitterbabe 
BB, you’re quoting Benjamin Kunkel, “the 32-year-old, freshly anointed darling of the New York literary set and author of the new novel “Indecision.””
He wants to sell books and he knows his market. Yes, you’re all just too fabulous and you’ll be even more fabulous with your own copy of Indecision.
That’s absolutely insane and absurd.
Kunkel understands what is wrong with gender relations. There is nothing about the behaviour of most women today that inspires passion in them.
Men used to build pyramids/build empires/go to war or at the very least give every waking hour to a lifetime of earning in order to impress and gain the favour of women. They have no incentive to do anything like that anymore.
Kunkel understands it is up to WOMEN to change the current abysmal state of gender relations. If women change, men will follow
No. It’s like with the labor movement: an individual worker striking won’t do it. There needs to be a general strike. If there is not a mass strike against such men they will be able to achieve libidinal expenditure relatively frequently, if not satisfyingly; they’ll fail to sublimate their libidinal energies in the way that actually makes men attractive, which is by accomplishing things that may not be what they’ve always wanted to accomplish but are worthy things all the same, and they’ll respond to women with the slack apathy with which one might respond to women if one felt that women were too available to them. Women as a whole should go on sexual strike; this is what I’m proposing.
Kunkel understand the state of gender relations, yes, but he’s just telling the Salon interviewer what she wants to hear.
Kunkel goes on to say this:
Interviewer: Why is it up to us? A girl likes to get laid, too, after all. Why should it be our responsibility to go on a sex strike just to energize the male population?
Kunkel: You need to make an old-fashioned masculine distinction between sex and love. Just find some guy and use him. The guys you want love from? Give them nothing.
Great advice, eh?
Men have received this message loud and clear. The more you want to give the less you will get.
That sentence should have read:
“There is nothing about the behaviour of most women today that inspires passion in men.”
Did you guys see this? I’d be curious what you think. The comments after are heartening.
Starcatcher,
I’ve seen the video – I thought it was very good.
It doesn’t show the whole picture, but there is a lot of truth in it.