the bacon

by rantywoman

After a surreal job search last year in which I was unable to land even a part-time job paying $11 an hour, I now find myself in a position that, in terms of salary, places me in the top five percent of full-time working women.

I have to work hard for this salary, of course, and have to cope with a lot of demands on my time and energy. In addition to that, I try to get to the gym as often as possible, to dress well, to wear make-up and have my hair professionally cut and colored, and so on.

On the rare occasions I date, I often do the driving to meet the guy and pay half the expense, or I keep the date casual so that if the man pays, he doesn’t have to pony up a lot of money.

In all this, I would just like to meet someone with whom I feel compatible and with whom I can have good conversation and make plans for the future.

And yet, that dream remains elusive. I work hard, work out, primp, meet men halfway… only to play the typical female waiting game, where the man is given all the power to make the decision, and I’m made to feel lucky if chosen.

It goes without saying that I’d hate to be stuck in a bad marriage or forced into poverty as single women can be in other countries, but it does feel like, although (some) women are doing everything now, the traditional rules of the dating game haven’t budged a bit. It’s hard to find the justification for putting myself through it any longer. I have to wonder, what does it take ?