I realized this week that I’m going to be okay, no matter what happens.
I applied for another job here and think a few more opportunities will open up. Ideally something will work out that will allow me to stay put; I’m guessing something will. The timing could actually work in my favor, as I can now spend more time on the farm and get through the end of Spanish II, which is a bit of a bear. I think I could more easily manage Spanish III and IV (less credits, less hours) while employed.
If I get that promotional opportunity in the small, conservative town thirty miles away, I could live there and learn to play guitar. Or buy a piano. Or get a dog. Or restore a house. And although I might not find ballet classes there, I did locate a number of yoga studios.
And if absolutely nothing works out in terms of a job by the end of next spring, I could go back to my former organization in L.A. I could handle it. I could work in East L.A. and practice my Spanish, or work on the coast and spend my weekends on the beach. I could find areas in which to thrive.
It’s too bad that a few of my friends couldn’t have held my hand and waited for me to get to the other side. I always do.