looking
by rantywoman
I’ve definitely stopped looking, and so far, no one is showing up. I think I’ve given up– if not all– quite a bit of hope. It does feel a little strange and uncomfortable and on occasion even deadening, but most of the time I’m okay.
http://www.huffingtonpost.com/kate-mirkin/looking-for-love_b_2949604.html
I don’t believe it’s possible to not be looking. To not look is to give up any hope of finding love. As far as I can tell, there is no better feeling in the world than to love and be loved. Why would you ever give up on finding that? Why would you ever stop looking?
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Hi Ranty,
When my most serious post-divorce relationship ended and I knew that ‘that was it’ for me and potential motherhood, it took me a while to realise that I was no longer looking. I did a little bit of internet dating, but my heart wasn’t in it anymore. I couldn’t muster up the enthusiasm to go through the whole palaver anymore. So I quit.
And my life has just kept getting better and better since.
I needed time out from relationships, from looking, from hoping, from trying.
It’s been a few years now that I’ve been single – the longest time in my life – and it’s turned out to be one of the most fulfilling and productive times of my life.
It’s not just being single and therefore being able to devote myself with a passion to what I love. It’s also being past childbearing age, and all the drama of that hoping, all that second-guessing of my options ‘just in case’.
The oestrogen levels are dropping. I have a clear head again. Finally.
Somewhere in the future is another life partner for me. I guess. Maybe not.
It’s not the end of the world if I’m single till I die. Life is good and I’m happy.
I’m not sure that I’m ‘not looking’ anymore. But I know I’m not searching anymore. And that is such a relief!
Jody x
http://www.gateway-women.com
I feel I’m entering that phase myself.
I hope I am starting to enter that phase….I am so tired of having a “single guy-dar” set to “on” 24/7. In the past month or so the feeling has weakened, which is something I hope continues – I think it’s because I have so many ideas for creative projects currently bubbling in my brain, and am also becoming increasingly gun-shy about sharing my baggage with prospective partners- staying single is becoming an increasingly attractive prospect. Dating burnout! I
I relate to all of that, but Friday night always tends to hit me with the “grinding loneliness.” I’m taking a class now so that at least keeps me busy in the early evening.