thebitterbabe

never married, over forty, a little bitter

pedestals

After having spent too much time with my mother this week, I can only conclude that parenting doesn’t necessarily make someone more empathetic.

And now here comes Mother’s Day:

http://www.salon.com/2010/05/08/hate_mothers_day_anne_lamott/

Rosenkavalier
Saturday, May 8, 2010 10:00 AM CDT
a pitch perfect article

Thanks, Ms. Lamott, for this article. I may have spent too much money on flowers for my mom this year, but I’m still sensitive to how strange and pointless this holiday is. A friend of mine recently lost her mother far too young, and I had to stop myself from posting smug facebook updates reminding everyone to get their mom flowers. You absolutely hit the nail on the head when you say that for some people, perhaps even most people, Mother’s Day is an occasion for guilt or grief.

And lest we forget, it’s important to remind ourselves that the entire idea of Mother’s Day was conceived by politicians trying to distract Suffragettes from what they actually wanted, the right to vote. Ultimately, Mother’s Day is about elevating the role of “mother” onto a pedestal while devaluing everything else about womanhood, and it has been from the beginning.

And another good one:

http://www.simonegrant.com/blog/2011/05/09/we-werent-close/

priorities

I can already tell that I’m going to miss the great selection of restaurants in Los Angeles and the surprising walkability of my former neighborhood, but I’m managing to stay focused on the core reasons I made the move, and stuff like this reminds me:

http://www.reddit.com/r/LosAngeles/comments/10tm1k/im_having_trouble_how_do_you_make_friends_in_los/

Already a couple of people have said to me, “You left Los Angeles for here?” But on another forum I saw someone reply to a similar inquiry with, “L.A. is not what it seems.”

Exactly.

I do also miss my yoga and dance teachers, but that’s kind-of a sad commentary if those were some of my primary relationships. I feel like I failed to find a new career field, a committed romantic relationship, and a core social group. I loved the weather and the restaurants and all the stuff to do, but I don’t think that’s enough for a fulfilling life.