flattened

by rantywoman

Made it “home.” Feeling sad and freaked out. Returning in a packed car, a la my college self, and visiting all my elderly relatives along the way while still having no family of my own is causing a fair amount of inner turmoil and grief.

I listened to this podcast on the drive and enjoyed a lot of it but the discussion around parenting did not help matters:

http://www.wtfpod.com/podcast/episodes/episode_382_-_hank_azaria

Hank Azaria was dragged into parenthood in his forties when his girlfriend became pregnant and now says that having a child is what “makes one human.” Marc Maron is considering first-time parenthood at forty-nine because his male friends who haven’t had children have all become “peculiar.” Nice.

I just don’t appreciate the fact that these two men spent forty-plus years avoiding parenthood (Azaria mentions his former girlfriends’ abortions) and now that they have the money and fame to pull it off in a far less stressful manner than the average person have chosen to denigrate the childless/ childfree.

I was heartened to see comments such as this one:

Joe Tily May 01, 2013 at 4:05 am

Great interview, but – Men who never want kids are infantile? Really? You just keep telling yourself that buddy . . . . whatever you need to make that decision late in the game. I’d say knowing yourself, being true to yourself and not giving-in to pressure from society and/or your girlfriend is very mature and responsible. I’m sick of this attitude of treating childless people as if they are weird, lacking something or damaged in some way. What the fuck is wrong with not wanting kids?

In related news, a male friend of mine in his late thirties just emailed me that he’s planning to move to L.A. I think things will be better for him because his worth on the dating market will only grow with continued career success, while I knew mine, at least in all the superficial ways, was over.

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