the leap

by rantywoman

This week one of my yoga teachers said, “Life begins at the edge of your comfort zone.” How appropriate for me right now!

I have truly enjoyed having these last few weeks off, and it’s the first time since graduating college I’ve allowed myself some time off without spending it worrying about my next job. It’s been deeply, deeply relaxing, and sometimes I feel so cozy and joyous that I worry I won’t ever be able to go back to work!

Every day, though, I force myself to do one or two things related to my upcoming move. I change my address with the post office, or give away more “stuff,” or give the utility companies a cut-off date. With each task, I have to give myself a little boost to get through it. Part of me is still scared about making this leap.

I have some tentative plans in place, though. I will have a roommate and will give that a year to see how it goes. I’m planning to sign up for some community college classes, partially for the health insurance but also because I’ve felt for a long time that I need to learn Spanish. I want to do so for the brain challenge but also because it should help me on the job market. I’d love to take a full load of classes and learn to play a musical instrument, to bake, to sew, but the expense is too much. I’ll have to give up a few of those ideas but not all.

The summer school schedule will be tight, but I’d like to start working part-time in the fall, or at least temping a few days a week. Hopefully that will eventually lead to something more permanent or at least get me some references in the local job market. By the next summer I should have made it through Level IV Spanish, and maybe I can take one of those Spanish immersion classes in another country during one of the school breaks.

Then… who knows? Maybe I’ll cave somewhere along the line and return full-time to my prior career. If I do, I hope it’s for a desirable position and I’m truly ready to go back. It’s hard for me to imagine right now ever wanting to work full-time again, but I still don’t know how I’ll swing things otherwise.

In any case, I’m making the leap, but I do have something of a parachute.