I’m starting to understand that my legacy won’t be in having children but will be, in whatever small way, spreading the idea that women can choose to follow alternative paths — that they can live interesting lives free of children. On an even wider scale, I’m thinking my life might turn into a questioning of all conventional paths– the assumed “work forty plus years then retire and play tennis” American way. It’s a motivating thought, anyway.
For another year, I struggled to understand what to do to repair my life. One day the answer fell into my ear – through a phone call offering me a teaching contract in China for a year. I jumped at the chance. I didn’t know it at the time, but that was probably when my vision for my life began to change.
Having the unexpected courage to choose such an unconventional path opened my eyes to the understanding that I could choose any life path. I began to realize that all along I had imagined children in my life because I’d always thought having kids was what women were supposed to do. I’d taken motherhood for the only choice. But in reality, it was only one choice.