the cracks
by rantywoman
As I slowly say goodbye to my work mates, they have expressed sadness to see me go, and I think, for the most part, it is genuine. I like to think I’m a decent person to work with, especially in comparison with some of the difficult types I’ve come across.
I told an unmarried female neighbor last night about my plans to leave and she, who is determined to stay on, spoke to me of her years-long spell of unemployment and how it has eaten through her entire life savings. I’m relieved that through a combination of practicality, modest living, and a small measure of luck I’ve saved a nice nest egg that should see me through my transition.
Reflecting on these things– my skill and diplomacy as an employee and my modest amount of financial savvy– as well as my loyalty and dependability as a friend, I can’t help but feel that when it comes to romance, I have somehow “fallen through the cracks.” That I have the raw material to be a good partner but no real way to advertise it and perhaps no market for it.
thebitterbabe 
Hi Ranty
I am wondering about your dating experiences in other cities and what your mind set was during that time. I am sure you have changed a lot during your time in Los Angeles and probably for the better. What I mean by this is perhaps you had certain exceptations of who you were looking to date and now have different ones.
I really do feel putting yourself into a different social enviroment combined with your acute self awareness is going to bring about something good.
When I was living in my former city I was in my thirties and was primarily looking for the conventional marriage/parenthood experience, although I took detours into other types of romances as well. At this point I’m no longer expecting to have kids and am open to a more unconventional partnership, but I would want it to be a monogamous and committed one.
Thanks for the vote of confidence as to my future prospects! I think moving has dredged up some of those feelings of loneliness in me again, but in terms of my new city, I’m thinking more about what I will do for a job and what kind of lifestyle I will have and less about whether I will meet someone because I guess I just don’t see that as hugely likely.
Your poor neighbor friend has fallen in the cracks economically. So many in the private sector have not having being their fault. It is heartbreaking.