I continue my search for people who have their “lights on”– those who are looking for friends and partners– with some success.
For example, I forced myself to look at an online dating site using the “get in and get out” method. I used a very restrictive search to come up with a short list of candidates and then wrote one person. I wanted to spend as little time as possible on it, as I’m still heavily ambivalent about the process. I did, however, end up on a nice date with a man who seems genuinely interested in finding someone. He also gushed about the photo I sent him, which was nice considering I’ve had the opposite reaction– the “thanks, but no thanks”– after emailing a photo.
Despite feeling under the weather, I also forced myself out to an event, one that involved a group of people I felt had not been particularly welcoming in the past. I guess, after too many bad experiences, I’ve become a bit paranoid, because the event was fun and everyone was friendly. I was asked out by someone I met there, although he’s much younger than me and may feel differently now that we have connected on Facebook. But that’s fine. Perhaps he could be a future party guest. I feel like having one man to consider is more than enough.
Both these men told me that they want to go to certain events but they don’t want to go alone. They were fairly emphatic about that. Who knows how many men sit at home feeling that way?